A Toast to the Bard

Posted by on Jan 25, 2014 in Blog | No Comments

Wallace’s tribute to a fellow Scot. Enjoy your haggis, neeps and tatties, fellow primates. The vegetarian option isn’t so bad!

A Scot to the core of his hairy heart!

A Scot to the core of his hairy heart!


Shock? Nae horrur! Ripped frae me mammy
But lil in arms nae lang efter
Denied mah rightful place at teat,
Did Ah arm ARM maeself tae th’ teeth!
Lion tail surroonded by liar’s tales,
I kent th’ truth an’ thay truth woods be
Mae armoor! 

Amoor th’ only weapon Tae wield
‘at coods pierce mah mighty shield,
I loo’d an’ tint an’ loo’d again
Ain in th’ end tae sorraw yield.
Only tae rise shiny an’ strang,
Lest breath is mine tae make lest lang
As coods be knoon roon hearth in sang! 

My tale has only jist begin.
The battles ur mony but th’ war rages oan
Ain stain alongside mah fellaw apes
Tae make true th’ tryst tae he in cape
Clad heed tae heel in truth he stands
Not lain but lonely still, wi’ mah honoor
Ah yield mah arm an’ loch
The glory mine an’ ne’er feint.


SHOCK! No, horror! Ripped from my Mother
But Babe in Arms not long after
Denied my rightful place at teat,
Did I arm ARM myself to the teeth!
Lion tail surrounded by Liar’s tales,
I knew the truth and the truth would be
my armour!

Amour the only weapon to wield
That could pierce my mighty shield,
I loved and lost and loved again
and in the end to sorrow yield.
Only to rise shining strong,
Last breath is mine to make last long
As could be known round hearth in song!

But my tale has only just begun.
The battles are many but the war rages on
And stand alongside my fellow apes
To make true the promise to he in cape
Clad head to heel in truth he stands
Not lone but lonely still, with my honour
Yield my arm and strength
The glory his and never feint.

Leave a Reply